29 February 2008

Which is Worse?

Ted Kennedy, Oprah Winfrey and Louis Farrakhan have all endorsed Barack Obama in his bid for the democratic presidential nomination.

Great! He's got the approval of a drunk senator, a woman who claims she's in touch with "the people," although she'd have no idea where to find the nearest WalMart and could never put dinner on the table for a family of 5 using only rice, kidney beans and cream of mushroom soup, and most recently, the full support of a man who is more racist than David Duke. Ahhhh ... but he has charisma and speaks well so let's make sure he gets on the ballot in November.

28 February 2008


I was all excited for HNT this week. I read the web site, found out what the theme was, and had my pic ready to go up last night ... then I re-read the post. Seems theme week is NEXT week - oops! This was the best I could do on short notice.

If any of you missed it, Matt-Man lost his HNT cherry today! It's worth a PEEK (or even an oogle) *giggle*

27 February 2008

TMI Tuesday (on Wednesday)

I know, it's not Tuesday anymore, but it's almost Thursday. Yep! That would make it Wednesday! Here is yesterday's pre-empted TMI Tuesday.

TMI Tuesday

1. What can you consider as the greatest thing you've ever done for/ to yourself?

Although there are several that rank right up there, I’d have to say that going back to college (a 40th birthday present to myself) to finish my degree is up at the top of the list.

2. What/ Which part of your life you think you could have done better and why?

Wow! I could have done many things better had I known better, but all of those mistakes make me “wise” beyond my years. I think I’ll keep them all!

3. Do you have that one person whom you consider to be the wind beneath your wings?

You're kidding me, right?? The "wind beneath my wings?" How 'bout I change that one just a bit to the person who influences my daily routine the most. I would say the one person who “keeps me honest” is my son. Making things better for him motivates me to make things better for myself. I’d hate to think of where I might be in life without him.

4. Tell us about your longest relationship.

Technically that would be the one I am in now. My husband and I have known each other for 19 years although we’ve been married just short of two years. Our relationship started out as friends with benefits (before there was such a thing), then switched to just friends when he married his (eventual) ex, then to a dating relationship 5 years ago and eventually marriage.

5. In a relationship, when do you get to that point of enough is enough?

When it becomes clear that mutual respect has been lost – when there aren’t any feelings left (even anger) – then enough is enough. I’m really close …

26 February 2008

What Have You Done For Me Lately?

100 posts … imagine that! It all started HERE and has managed to include a visit from "Mommy Dearest", the loss of my "Dream Job", my successful "Return to Work", and tits, tits, tits and even more tits. Then, just to see if anyone was paying attention, I threw a neck bone in there. I’ve also learned many things about blogging, bloggers, and life in general, for example:

Sex Sells - If there was any doubt in my mind, it has been erased by the recent successful implementation of Half-Nekkid Thursday and the quadruple number of blog hits I get on that day.

Unfound Talent is Rampant - If you have any doubts, visit any of those “Clickworthy Folks” on my sidebar. There are some amazing bloggers who serve as a daily inspiration to me.

Competition is Gratifying - Throw me a challenge, whether it be a contest for a witty remark or one requiring me to write a short story and I’ll do my best to step up to the plate. So will dozens of other bloggers whose abilities continually astound me.

Bloggers are Good People - Generally, they look out for one another, do their best to build people up rather than tear them down, and they usually say “excuse me” when they burp.

No Blogger is an Island - Just when I think I am in a place where no one else can even imagine being – when I feel completely and totally isolated – I receive a comforting comment or an unsolicited email and suddenly the isolation is lifted. It is an extraordinary benefit to blogging!

A great big "THANKS" to all of you who visit and encourage me with your comments as well as those of you who stop by just for the tits (you know who you are). I started blogging to clear my mind, but blogging had another plan – it expanded my mind, and my world, and has made me feel a part of something again!

25 February 2008

Female Orgasms - What You Want (Need?) To Know

A few weeks ago I posted my first TMI Tuesday. One of the questions was, "How many types of orgasms have you experienced?" There were a few of you - OK, it was Jay and R.E.H. - who posted comments indicating they'd be interested in hearing about the different types of female orgasm. Well, I was needing something to write about today and thought maybe it was time to explore this - and boy did I explore!

The general consensus is that there are three different ways for a woman to reach orgasm: stimulation of the clitoris, vaginal stimulation (includes G-spot stimulation), or stimulation of both simultaneously. And yes, some women do experience female ejaculation (the release of a prostatic fluid-like substance) as part of a vaginal or combined orgasm. Where there is a great difference is in the duration and intensity of an orgasm. Duration and intensity differ from woman to woman and from one sexual experience to the next.

The most common orgasm in women is a single orgasm - one in which the woman experiences one rush of pleasure. This type of orgasm can last anywhere from a few seconds to over a minute.

Then we have sequential multiple orgasms - orgasms that occur in sequence, separated by a few minutes. Sequential multiple orgasms are often described as a roller coaster ride (a really good roller coaster ride I might add).

The ultimate in female orgasms? Well, this would be the multiple orgasm; an orgasm that occurs when several orgasms are had in a row (one right after the other without delay). Uncommon, but well worth working towards.

As Southern Sage commented, "I don't know how many types of orgasms I've had but I am sure I liked every kind a whole damn lot!!!" I'd have to agree with that.

24 February 2008

Sunday Secret

I don't want to believe in God because then I have to believe that "he" thinks I deserve this life that *I* have created.

22 February 2008

Fruits and Vegetables

I realize this is likely not the pic you were hoping for (was anyone thinking bananas and cucumbers?), but too fucking bad!

I can't begin to tell you how proud I am to have received this award - it's the peach (or is it Shrek's ass butt after eating too many carrots?) ... whatever, it is a coveted award given out by Doc over at You Just Keep On Believing That . This award is one that many bitch slap each other to get lovingly attempt to grasp even though only one can be awarded each week, and I was the lucky one this week! Doc hosts a Weekly Word Game where he posts an off-the-wall news story then asks his readers to fill in the blank portion with some smart-ass witty prose. It is a lot of fun to play, and even more fun to read the creative responses! If you are just dying to read my winning entry, you can find it [HERE]

Thanks to Doc, for hosting this game, and everyone else be sure to visit his co-authored blog (no Mountain Cat, I didn't forget you) by clicking [HERE] for a daily dose of humor as well as the Weekly Word Game!

Now on to vegetables ... I'm thinking brussel sprouts ...

What?? You were hoping for eggplant? Yeah, I saw that in a YouPorn video once too!

21 February 2008


One of the most sensitive places on my body - guaranteed to produce goosebumps everytime.

20 February 2008

PFC #1

Here it is! The first installment of Picture Fiction Challenge, brought to you by the letters R.E.H. Click [HERE] for all of the details and to join in next month's fun!

Calm. Serene. Content. Pastoral. As I sit in my cockroach infested flat, staring out the window, these are the words that enter my mind. Not because I can see them or feel them, but because I want them. There is little that can distract me from the smell of borscht cooking in the flat next to me or the sounds of the children upstairs, screaming for their grandmother's attention, but these words are more powerful than the world around me.

It is only when I allow myself the comfort of my thoughts that I can escape this 23-year-old body that defines me as nothing more than an average young man. No limits. No presumptions. Just me.

I think. Scattered thoughts. I ponder what could be. Success? Achievement? Love? Oh, love. Love I long for, the desire to love and to be loved. It seems to be so elusive yet I know that it is something within my grasp. I see that look in the eyes of those that have it. I wonder. Did they just go out and get it or was it with them all of the time?

A leaf blows by my window. I watch it float downward, fluttering side to side, almost as if it is wanting to make a decision but unable to determine which way to fall. My life is very much like that leaf. I wonder what will happen when the leaf hits the ground. Will it just lie there, or will a gust of wind bring it back to life?

I study the leaf's journey, almost as if its fate will mirror my own. Slowly it falls, but is suddenly picked up by a gentle breeze just as it grazes the sidewalk. The leaf and the wind carry on an intricate, gentle romance, until I can no longer see their dance.

Without warning, I am jolted back to the reality of my own life. The borscht is being served. I can hear the metallic clank of the spoons on the ceramic bowls next door and the children in the flat above jumping to the beat of their grandmother's melodic accordion.

I get up from my reflective perch at the window and head upstairs to join them. They dance the polka of youth, of love and longing, and I know they will teach me their secrets.

19 February 2008

TMI Tuesday

Ready or not, It's time for another TMI Tuesday! I have no doubt that all of you are just waiting on pins and needles to learn the answers to this week's questions.

TMI Tuesday

1. By what nickname(s) were you known as a child?

I've had only two nicknames in my lifetime - one given to me by my father (chipmunk cheeks) and one given to me by the Army("TJ" - the first two letters of my very Norwegian last name that no one in the Army was able to pronounce).

2. Do you have a favorite poem and, if so, what is it? Recite it (or a snippet) here, please.

The first poem I ever memorized remains my favorite. I came across it while reading "The Outsiders" (S.E. Hinton) when I was 11 years old. It's a gem from Robert Frost:

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

3. What is your greatest regret in life, something that you failed to do that you wish you did?

It's difficult for me to pick a single, greatest regret. On one hand, there are so many things I wish I had done differently, on the other hand I am where I am right now due to the choices (good and bad) that I've made in the past. Although my current circumstances may not be ideal, I am the sum of my experiences and most days I like who I am!

Regrets? They kind of hold you back. I'd much rather set goals.

4. You are tired and hungry, but it's too late to cook. If any snack food were available to you, what would you choose and why?

Peanut butter toast! There is nothing I like more than a slice of whole wheat bread, lightly toasted, with melted peanut butter on top. Fills me up and tastes YUMMY!

5. What is the oldest item of clothing (not jewelry!) that you wear regularly and what do you love about it?

I don't really have an answer to this question! After last year's weight loss, I had to replace almost all of my clothes (with the exception of shoes). If I include shoes my absolute favorite is a pair of Gore-Tex Army Boots. OK ... OK ... they aren't the most stylish pair of footwear, but they are extremely comfortable and NOTHING beats them in winter weather. They are 17 years old and still do an excellent job!

18 February 2008

The Rest of the Story

First things first ... Birdman brought to my attention an oversight on my "The Day You Were Born" post - in a nutshell, I gave Mariah Carey too much credit! If you watched the video, you may have noticed that Mariah was not alone - Boyz II Men also performed AND co-wrote the song. Must give credit where credit is due.

Second, I finished up my first Picture Fiction Challenge project and it is ready to post on Wednesday. I am completely terrified excited at the prospect of sharing this creative endeavor. Anyone interested in participating in this challenge still has a few more creative days to "Get 'er Done!" Visit R.E.H. [HERE] for all of the details.

Last but not least, I thought I'd share a little background on the issues surrounding a few of my recent Sunday Secrets. I don't often talk about my family situation on this blog (at least not directly), but I'm thinking there just might be a few of you out there that not only can identify with my situation, but may even have some words of wisdom.

My family is a "blended" one. Husband and I have known each other for over 20 years, but have been in a "relationship" for just the last five years, and married just short of two years. Although we don't have any ours kids, we do have some his and hers kids. On husband's side, T1 is 20 years old, the bio son of ex-wife that husband adopted when T1 was 10. We also have D2 (13), bio daughter of husband and ex-wife. On my side we've got C3 (12), my bio son from a previous relationship.

"Blended" marriages/families are far more of a challenge than I ever imagined. They require that you take all of those ideas you've learned throughout life about what a marriage is and throw them out. Whomever said, "Love will conquer all" never had to deal with a blended family. We've got ALL of the struggles usually common in marriages coupled with a shitload myriad of additional challenges. It's no wonder second marriages experience a 62% failure rate.

We've had a difficult year. Both husband and I experienced a job loss - his in May of 2007 (he was unemployed for almost 4 months) and mine in November, however our biggest struggle has been in defining parenting relationships in regards to C3. As you may recall from a previous Sunday Secret, C3's father died about three years ago. C3 never met his father, although he did speak with him on the phone two or three times. Due to the non-existence of a father figure, husband has taken it upon himself to fill that spot. An admirable undertaking, but one that has been volatile at best - not because of any resistance by C3, but because husband's expectations and demands of C3 are far greater than his demands and expectations of T1 and D2. Husband also refuses to acknowledge C3's Asperger Syndrome (autism spectrum) diagnosis and would prefer to believe C3 is jusy "lazy."

Most recently, this manifested in parenting actions that crossed that proverbial "acceptable" line. Although I'm not comfortable sharing the nitty-gritty details, I will say that this was a serious breach of safety in the home - safety C3 deserves to expect but that was violated. Having grown up in a home where similar behaviors were tolerated, I knew that I had to do something about this now.

Of course, husband has shown a great deal of remorse, but that remorse has been sprinkled with bits of justification. In my world, there is no justification for what happened. I did something I never do - I gave an ultimatum.

In a manner beyond calm, I explained to husband that this must NEVER happen again, and that if it did there would be no discussion about the next step - C3 and I would leave immediately. I also demanded (yes, I really did!) that we begin family counseling immediately or again, C3 and I would need to leave, as I was concerned for his safety. Within three days, we were in the office of a family counselor and we continue with weekly visits.

I don't know where this will lead. Some days I think I will never be able to forgive husband's actions, other days I think I may be able to move beyond what I feel to be his ultimate betrayal, but I know that I will never forget what happened. I feel a great deal of anger (at husband) and guilt (at me) and no longer feel confident that I'm always doing the right thing. This week, I'll have the opportunity to sort through my own thoughts without having to deal with husband's thoughts. I see it as an opportunity to gain clarity and I plan to use it to my advantage.

17 February 2008

Sunday Secret

I'm not nervous about you leaving, but I am nervous about your return. I'm afraid the peaceful reality of your absence will erase any fear I have of being alone again.

16 February 2008

On The Day You Were Born

I was hoping to get in a "normal" post before Secret Sunday, but was having a difficult time getting serious enough to write about politics, or silly enough to keep you entertained with just words, and then ... there was something for me to copy a divine intervention. I was doing my Google Reader thing and discovered R.E.H. had done a little piece on "What was the no. 1 song on the day you were born" Cool! Something to blog about!

Clearly, R.E.H. is much younger than I am. His no. 1 song was The Partridge Family's, "I Think I Love You" Great ... not only did I have a David Cassidy poster hanging above my bed (oh the things he inspired me to do), but I had a Partridge Family lunch box and I had memorized all of the words to "Brown Eyes" (David Cassidy was singing that song to me, just in case you had any doubts!)

Anyone up for a classic? Does anyone who reads my blog actually know who Frankie Valli was?? On the day I was born Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons had hit the top of the charts with "Rag Doll"

Ummm ... yeah ... I'm feeling a bit like a classic myself!

Just to make myself feel not quite so old for shits and grins, I decided to run my son's birthday. I occasionally hear this song played on the radio, so I must not be that old, right?? It's Mariah Carey's, "One Sweet Day"

Maybe I should add these to my iPod playlist ...

14 February 2008

Half-Nekkid Thursday


Southern Sage over at Sage Advice introduced me to Half-Nekkid Thursday (HNT). If you want to learn more about it you can click on the "Half-Nekkid Thursday" button above or click HERE.

These are the basic guidelines:

  • In that North American, Puritanical way that most of my readers think, "Nekkid", or its variations, somehow insinuates sex, or its variations. WRONG!! The purpose of "Half-Nekkid Thursday" is not to see sex acts! It is the celebration of exposure. Of your big toe. Of your breastbone. Of your knuckles. Of your uvula. Whatever. Of course, sex acts can qualify, so if you want to post those.....
  • "Nekkid" is not the same as nude! Again, nude qualifies, but it is not a requirement!
  • Pictures should be taken of you or by you.

If you click on the Half-Nekkid Thursday link, you'll also find a list of participants. Some of these photos are amazing - provocative and just downright sexy!

13 February 2008

I'm a Delinquent ... or is that Deviant?

It's not like that, in itself, is even remotely blog worthy as all of you already know that, but I wanted to get your attention. Did it work??

Last week Leighann bestowed upon me an award and I (shamefully) never brought it over to my blog. I think that deserves a spanking ... or at the very least a time out.

It's the First Class Friendship Award and I am proud that she chose me as the recipient!

Leighann and I "met" on a Yahoo Groups list for moms of boys about 18 months ago. Even though she is just a "baby," we had much in common and our friendship went from the list to regular contact on IM. It wasn't until December (?) of this year that we met in person. I took the 2-hour road trip through miles and miles of corn fields (and nothing else - and I do mean NOTHING), stumbled through shitty bogus directions from MapQuest and made several phone calls to Leighann attempting to find myself her - the rest is history!

It's one of those friendships that would have never come to fruition had it not been for the internet making this big world a little smaller.

12 February 2008

TMI Tuesday

TMI Tuesday

I was looking for a weekly feature that I could add to my blog that was a bit different, and I came upon TMI Tuesday HERE. I thought I'd give it a shot - if nothing else, it gives me an opportunity to write about some sexy things (and yes, I'll add pics on occasion for those of you who are visual readers). Yes, it's kind of like a mini-meme, but without the tagging!

1. What's the sexiest gesture a person you are sexually interested can make?

I would have to say the one thing that will always get my attention is to have someone's undivided attention when I least expect it - an unexpected phone call, a random ecard ... nothing big, just a thought of me that replaces their normal daily grind.

2. What are three inevitable things about you?
  • Coffee will always be a part of my morning
  • I will take care of those I love before taking care of myself
  • I'll put up with a lot, but once someone crosses that line, I am DONE with them.
3. How many types of orgasms have you experienced?

I don't know that I can quantify types of orgasms. Depending on the circumstances of getting there, they vary greatly.

4. what asset do you have besides the physical and the material?

Persistence. If there is something I want - REALLY want - I will pursue it until it is mine. The good news is that I don't usually do this with people!

5. What do you want . . . . now?

Peace and balance in my life ... and SEX (it's been far too long)!

10 February 2008

Sunday Secret

When you told me there would be no card or any other recognition of Valentine's Day, I told you it didn't matter. I only said that so that you would never know how much it hurt my heart.

08 February 2008


Have any of you heard the hubbub surrounding this Abercrombie & Fitch advertisement?

When did the human body become vulgar? Maybe I'm in the minority, but I just don't find these ads to be obscene. Provocative? Absolutely, but not obscene. What I find really interesting about all of this is that Lynnhaven Mall also houses a Victoria's Secret. The last time I walked by a Victoria's Secret store there were some pretty suggestive/provocative photos of lingerie models hanging in the windows. Why are the standards for Abercrombie & Fitch seemingly different?

I think it's unfortunate that our society equates the human body with words like lewd, obscene and disgusting. The human body is something to be appreciated, not something to be ashamed of ... but then I posted a photo of my tits on this blog ... maybe I'm not the best one to define obscene!

07 February 2008

Blame it on Birdman

He was tired of opening my blog and getting nothing but tits. What do you get instead? Politics!

Seems I just can't stay away from the topic these days. I try … I really try … but the political process is just so corrupt and phony fascinating that I can't seem to stop talking about it.

As many of you know if you watch any news, we have some REBATES on the table. Just in case anyone is at all confused, dictionary.com defines REBATE as:

a return of part of the original payment for some service or merchandise; partial refund.

And just in case you haven't been following the news closely, the stimulus package currently gives REBATES to people who paid no taxes. I don't know about all of you, but I call that a HANDOUT, not a rebate.

However, this may be a mute point. Why? Well, what started out as a $161 BILLION package in the House has morphed in to a $205 BILLION package in the Senate. It seems the Democrats have decided this stimulus package should could bring them a political advantage - that Republicans will pay a very high price if they oppose the added REBATES for older Americans and disabled veterans, as well as heating aid for the poor, up to an additional 26 weeks of unemployment benefits and a much larger collection of business tax breaks than the House approved. In this election year, it's all about making the other guy look bad.

This is how our government works. One side makes a proposal that they have "promised" - one that the media has hyped up and the "people" assume is the truth. Then the other side loads it with special interest extras, knowing it's likely it will pass through because there is that promise out there that needs to be kept at any cost. But then again, what's $44 BILLION amongst friends?

One last thing ... any complaints about my flashing moving down the page should be sent directly to Birdman - you can find him HERE .

05 February 2008

Fat Tuesday

In celebration of Fat Tuesday, I'm hoping to earn your beads ... if I can't get to New Orleans, I'll just have to create a cyber carnival! Who's got the King's cake??

03 February 2008

Sunday Secret

You don't want to hear about my fantasies anymore, so I wrote them down and emailed them to him. He enjoyed them.

02 February 2008

Weekly Wrap Up

I actually earned a TGIF this week, and here it is - Saturday already! Thoughts and challenges I've had this week:
  • Norm, who was quirky but endearing in the begining, has made the full transition in just 5 days to quirky but irritating. It just wouldn't be a "job" if there wasn't a Norm involved.
  • Working for a family business in a small town has its benefits - like when they let employees leave early due to significant weather issues (with pay). It happened twice this week.
  • Sometimes you have to accept that fighting for what is "right" can blind you from doing what is "right" (more on that later)
  • Friends can be found in unexpected places and real friends seem to have an uncanny ability to pop into your life when you need them most
  • Priorities have to be re-evaluated and reorganized on a regular basis or life swings entirely out of balance
  • The blog world seemed to have a strong tit theme this week and I really enjoyed it!

Now, if I could just work in a bit more time for blogging ...