01 January 2019

TMI Tuesday | Happy New Year Wishes 2019

(via TMI Tuesday Blog)

1. Daily rituals. Do you have any that you will abandon in the new year? Will you begin new daily rituals? If yes, what?
I've never considered daily rituals to be something negative that need to be abandoned, so no - I have none that I will abandon. I do plan on beginning some new daily rituals although I haven't decided what they will look like. In doing much self-reflection over the past few months I've come to the realization that I need more structure and accountability than I've been living the last few years.
2. What significant relationship improved the most?
My first thought was to say that the relationship with my mom is the most significant relationship that improved the most, but then had a realization. Although my relationship with my mom has improved over the past year, it's my relationship with myself that has improved the most, and I'm not sure there is any more significant relationship than the one you have with yourself.
3. What relationship in your life deteriorated?
There have, unfortunately, been a few that have deteriorated
  • The relationship with my step brother, although I was really trying to force that one and should have written it off before it ever started. I created that problem
  • The relationship with [REDACTED] because I finally stood up to him and did not cower when he demanded that I do a certain thing and I "outed" him on a public forum. If there is one thing narcissists hate, it's being pointed out to those they are trying to manipulate. The reason the name is [REDACTED]? Because I was told, "My name is not a dick so keep it out of your mouth!" Yeah ... classy
  • The relationship with my son. Honestly? This one is on me and stems from my parenting from a standpoint of guilt. This deterioration began when son was 7 and has just gotten worse over the years. I'm not sure how to fix this and that makes me sad
4. What do you wish you had done more of in 2018? How do you plan on doing more of that in 2019?
This one is easy - SELF CARE!!! And how am I planning on doing more of that in 2019? It goes back to my answer in question one. I truly need structure and accountability and I need to hold myself accountable for my self care
5. What important person in your life needs more of your time? Will you give it?
This is starting to sound like ME!ME!ME!, but you know what? I've NEVER made myself a priority - I've always given that designation to others. I need more of my time and I am going to do my best to give that to myself!
Bonus: How can you redesign your evenings to bring more restful “you” time to the end of your day?
This, too, goes back to question one and identifying rituals that push me to grow, yet are attainable. I'm working on that list now!

31 December 2018

I Need to Get Back Here

And with original content ...

This space had become a repository for TMI Tuesdays and Sunday Stealings. Although those aren't necessarily bad things, they weren't exactly great things either, and I lost interest.

How many times have I said that writing is therapeutic for me, yet I might as well have just been regurgitating nonsense these past few months.

Yes, there will be a TMI Tuesday tomorrow, but I am going to work on original content this year. I have an opportunity to grow and thrive and that's not going to happen just regurgitating.

Eeeuuuuwwww - that's kind of an ugly visual

25 December 2018

TMI Tuesday | Happy Holiday Season!

(via TMI Tuesday Blog)

1. Are you celebrating or have you celebrated any holidays this December 2018?
I have not - and will not - celebrate and holidays this December 2018. Cam is in Utah spending the holiday with his girl friend's family so there really isn't anyone to celebrate with/for. We did all go to a steakhouse dinner (me, my mom, Cam, and his girlfriend) before the kids left, but it wasn't like a Christmas. 
2. Describe your typical holiday celebration.
That's kind of funny right there! I haven't had a "typical" holiday celebration since I was probably 16? That's 38-years ago for anyone counting. I have spent the holidays in so many different situations - nothing is typical and seldom s there an actual celebration.

3. Now tell us how you really would like to spend your holiday season.
I'd like to spend my holiday season not alone. Maybe with an actual tree in the house with wrapped gifts under it. Maybe even a stocking filled with goofy little things. Just not alone.
4. This time of year broadcast TV is filled with Christmas movies. What is your favorite Christmas movie?
I actually watched my favorite Christmas movie yesterday - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. I also watched Polar Express for the first time ever. I don't know ... sappy holiday movies make me feel ickier when I'm spending the holiday alone, so I tend to stay with the silly ones.
5. Does your place of work do a gift exchange or secret santa? Do you participate? What gift did you buy to giveaway this year? What gift did you get?
One of the downsides to working exclusively remotely is that there aren't any holiday work parties - not work potlucks - no Secret Santa.
Bonus: Have you been naughty or nice?
Naughty ... always naughty ... but in the nicest way! 😈