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Feminism. It came up, although indirectly, in the comments to my post on Monday. I do believe that women strive to "act like men" at times, and especially in the workplace. Now, before all of you men get your boxers in a bunch, I realize just how sexist that comment is to both genders, but I'm not eloquent enough this morning to put the concept into less sexist words.My dear friend Librarian Lee (who I've *known* for over 10 years now) said it best:
I think I sort of fell off the feminist bandwagon when I got the impression that all that won freedom was so that we could be more like men. That camp, to me, is buying into the notion that men ARE better, men are the rule and women the exception. And, I absolutely disagree. I had hoped that the goal was to say, something like, we are women, we birth and nurture babies and we cry and we make homes, yet we are valued, and so are our tears, and we are strong and capable and 50%, not the exception. We've accepted that the workplace should be "male" and I have to wonder what it would look like if it were male and female.
Feminism first got its big push when Title IX was passed in 1972. For those of you
No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, or denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any educational program or activity receiving federal financial assistance.
In a nutshell, Title IX gave girls "equal" opportunity in many areas, but specifically in education and school sanctioned sports. It was needed as this country was still a bit resistant to the idea that women deserved the same opportunities as men.
The problem? Somewhere along the line, womens' equality morphed into "women must act like men." I don't blame men for this. In fact, I really don't blame anyone for this. I think it likely happened because women looked at the behaviors of successful men, and emulated those behaviors as they strived for their own success. What we ended up with was a feminist movement that moved women to act like men.
Men and women are different. We are physically different (don't get all d'uh on me here - you know what I mean). We are emotionally different. Women are not better, nor worse than men, but we are different. "Acting like men" minimizes our importance and contribution as women.
Gender equality isn't about sameness, it's about equal opportunities, and more importantly, equal value in society - for both women and men.
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22 comments:
I love being woman. I'll admit there are some things I can't do because I'm not a man, but I also feel there are many more things I can do than men can do. And having said that, I think there are things women shouldn't do; we should leave it to the men, and vice versa.
Okay, I'm trying not to step on anyone's toes or make anyone mad at me, or say the wrong thing.
Let's just say I agree 100% with your friend. 'nough said.
Problem is, we can't legislate our way to equality.
Women don't often have the political clout and informal networks that men have.
There seems to be some sort of resistance that keeps women from teaming up effectively to their own benefit.
For example, One female VP I worked with refused to hire women in her department no matter their qualifications.
She freely admitted that she didn't want other women getting attention in her department.
Weird stuff.
I like your last sentence...
Equal Gender Value
I think that sums it up.
I do not consider myself a Feminist and I have negative feelings about the word. I am a smart, educated, successful woman. I work in the legal/corporate/good old boy's club world. I love it. I love that I have to strive a little harder. I love that have to fix my lipstick before a meeting and keep fancy heels in my desk just incase. To me that is all part of being a woman. That is what makes women special and different than men.
To a certain extent I think that I was born too late to really understand what women had go through to gain equality. I know the facts about what happened, but it is not anything that I ever had to live. I find that some older women are insulted by my view on feminism. I am thankful for what the accomplished, but I don't ever want gender blindness in the work place or in life.
The biggest problem with Title IX is that it has, in more than a few cases, taken away men's athletic programs in some colleges.
Title IX calls for a proportional number of female athletes involved in programs, some men's programs have been done away with due to the economics of fulfilling the requirements of Title IX.
I am not saying that female athletes (or any female in any line of work, etc.) shouldn't be given opportunites by any means, I am speaking purely on the economic effects on universities.
Schools have been forced to do away with some Men's programs that generate money in order to create women's athletic programs that lose money. That's all.
I personally, never even think of whether of person I work with or whatever is a man or a woman. I simply judge their abilities, personality, and whatever based on the fact of whether they're an asshole or not.
Cheers!!
You know, I never looked at it like that before: women trying to become men - in terms of speaking of. That's really interesting because I joke around a lot with "women really got screwed over when they protested for women's lib"... But all in all, now we have to rise up for the occasion, (not on so many levels lol) and prove ourselves more than ever; almost compete. My partner works for a car dealership and the cutthroat action she sees in there is unbearable, and even that much more challenging when she is in the midst of testosterone. On another related note, her lunch always gets eaten before she sees it...they're like tigers in there!
Anyway, I'll stick to Domestic Goddess taking care of my mate any given day!
Bina. I'm not afraid to step on toes, so let me ask you this ... are saying that there is some validity to the "standard" gender roles? I'll be the first to admit that I practice "standard" gender roles on some levels with a fierce streak of independence mixed in.
Hammer, I agree, we can't legislate our way to equality, but some times we do need to legislate the "bones" of equality. I know that womens' resistance first hand - we (generally) are not too good at working TOGETHER for a common goal. We tend to spend more time cutting down other women than we do helping to bring them up.
Real Live Lesbian, it really isn't about one gender being better, is it?
Karen, like you, I have VERY negative feelings about the word feminist. To me, the word conjures up images of a woman fueling her power by emasculating men. Although I believe in taking care of myself, I also have a strong pull towards taking care of my husband and family. I've often gotten grief for admitting to bringing my husband his coffee - in bed - each morning.
Matt-Man, there were/are some issues with Title IX - finances being one of those. I think it's difficult to put a $$ value on giving women opportunities to compete in sports, but there is no doubt that womens' sports in no way come close to generating the $$ that male sports do.
And I, too, believe that there is no gender bias in asshole capabilities!
Deb, when you think about it, the way to success is to emulate those that are successful. With men dominated the workforce for so long, those were the role models we had to look towards. Unfortunately, in doing so, I think we've lost much about what a woman is and should be.
I think Title IX went horribly wrong when the Feminists realized they could use it for vengeance.
I think it was acceptable to eliminate men's sports to fund womens sports in order to equalize opportunities. The problem is, it was turned into a quota system (or a favoritism system) So that girls are given a good deal more opportunities than the boys.
All the time this is happening, schools are pushing for 'equality' in science and math, but ignoring the same standards for young boys especially in Language arts
Also, schools make little to no effort to do the same for other extra curriculars.
Basically, the biggest problem is that Feminism (the political movement) as turned Title IX into a law that is contradictory to feminism (the idea of equality) and the original Title IX
Feminism no longer mean equality to most people, just as 'gay' no longer means happy.
Oooo....EXCELLENTLY stated!
*applause*
:)
I agree with the notion that sometimes women act like men. Let me give you an example....maybe this is a poor one or maybe I have the wrong idea but I will give it a shot anyway...
I work with all men, and to fit in better I have to act a little bit like one of the guys.
Do I have the right idea? I don't like the fact that I have to act like one of them to fit in but should I accept that I have to do this in the first place?
I've always prided myself- even before it was legislated, of treating women as equals. Growing up, I watched them excel at stuff guys did not. That freedom cost them a few things too. The world expects more from a woman now- no doubt of it! When you show them what you can do- they let you! Less work for them...
Matt and Aaron stole my thunder on the title IX situation.
I loed the last line also...great post
I think you're overlooking the fact that men are better than women.
You lot are pretenders to the throne. But you look pretty. And you cook and clean a treat. That child-raising business is handy, too.
(This feminist-exploding hand grenade comment was brought to you by Leon "The Wind-up Merchant" Hart.)
I can't really seem to put together any coherent thoughts on this subject. I kind of disagree with Matt-Man in that football and men's basketball are the only profitable sports at most universities. There are a handful of schools where women's b-ball and baseball make money, but not that many. Virtually all sports that are eliminated in order to comply with Title IX are sports that don't generate any revenue like golf or tennis.
But as for feminism? I got nothing.
Being a man isn't all it's cracked up to be, Dana. Once in a while it really sucks. What we need in this counrty is equal opportunity based on each persons ability to do what is presented to them. A 150lb woman is not going to play defensive tackle on any college football team. Neither, is any 150lb man. No one should get any opportunity based on their sex, race, creed, religion, etc, etc. Can you "do" the opportunity? That should be the question and the answer, period!
The problem is too many people- in all facets of life - have gotten into a victimization by chance mentality. They believe they are a victim if they can't or don't do the same things as everyone else - even if they don't want to do that thing. Unfortunately, the Feminists really lead that charge. Look at the quota system, it basically says if girls don't want to play sports, it's the boys' fault and therefor they can't play.
Instead of valuing each person for their own interests while encouraging them to be diverse, we regulate to perceived desired outcome regardless of what's best for the person or what they desire. If a girl wants to be in the Environmental club and be a teacher, it's because she was gender stereotyped as a child by society. She should want to be a football player and an engineer.
And touching on what we're doomed said, I'm a male teacher in a K-8 elementary building. I pretty much have to hope the parents just think I'm gay and not a pedophile until they get to know me
Aaron, thanks for stopping by! I found your blog to be full of information that confirmed what I already believed. Being raised in the new Title IX era (I was 8 when it passed and was finally allowed to play Little League Softball), and now raising a son (13 yo), I see both sides fairly well, and I think the feminist movement is steam rolling my son's education.
Vixen, now, if I could just get people to stand on my soapbox with me!
rage, it's not so much fitting in to a work group by adapting similar behaviors, but rather accepting that the only way for success in that work group is to act more like a man ... if that makes any sense.
buff, I do think it's ironic that the feminist movement is a bit of a double edged sword. Fine women, you want to do it? Then do it - the good, the bad and the ugly.
Bond, I hate it when Matt-Man steals my thunder ... or anything else of mine for that matter!
Leonhart, some of us look pretty, others of us have to cook and clean even better because we don't look so good *sticks tongue out*
Jay, I would be interested to see just what the $$ losses are - now - due to Title IX requirements. My guess is they may have been more significant in the 70's and 80's, but women's collegiate sports have become quite popular and certainly generate more $$ than ... say ... water polo.
doomed, don't get me wrong, that's actually my point! Men have been negatively impacted by the feminist movement on many fronts, and not based on anything other than an attempted power shift. I am quite disturbed to see how the movement has impacted Cam.
I often get into arguments with women who believe they should be allowed to fill combat positions in the military. I always ask if they can meet the same physical requirements as men and am told that no, they can't, but they can meet the modified requirements for women. Screw that! If someone needs to cart my ass out of a battle field I want to make sure they can actually do it!
Aaron, your statement I'm a male teacher in a K-8 elementary building. I pretty much have to hope the parents just think I'm gay and not a pedophile until they get to know me is really a sad commentary of where our heads are these days (as a society). Quite frankly, if there weren't so many women in K-8 education I believe our boys would be performing to their capabilities. As it is they have to attempt to navigate a female learning style and hope for the best.
Oops! That's another rant entirely, but I applaud you for your efforts at the elementary/middle school level!
All legaleese aside, I think that we have missed it and we continue to miss it.
Both genders are so pre-occupied with what they will lose that they don't realize what they win.
Women miss Men's agression and stamina. Men, lack a woman's ability to gather different perspectives and understanding and certainly do not have the Compassion women seem to have.
After all these years one would think that we would have evolved into understanding that men and women need each other equally in order to balance everything out....
The reason that men sports programs get shut down is because the football team won't give up their 100+ slots for those other teams. They don't need all those hundred spots. If they give up 25 spots, two mens programs might survive.
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