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Dear Twitter follower, unfollower, blocker, protected tweeter, public tweeter, follower, unfollower, blocker, unblocker, blocker, protected tweeter (in that order, all in the span of about 60 days), the fact that you continue to read my blog and search the twitter stream for my tweets, all-the-while posting passive-aggressive tweets in response to what you find, and not only denying you are doing so - but claiming you are the victim - is just plain CREEPY! Your social media psychosis says far more about you than it does about me.
I know from experience, passive-aggressive really isn't the best way to handle things - seldom will it do anything other than give you a feeling of false superiority and an "out" should you get called on it. Heaven knows I've tried the direct approach with you several times, most recently with no response other than additional passive-aggressive tweets/blog post innuendos.
If passive-aggressive is your only mode of dealing with conflict, you might want to insure that you can take it as well as you dish it out. Yes, I've been giving you exactly what I've been getting from you, but at least I have the scruples and personal integrity to admit to it.
That word hypocrite that you throw around so casually? If I were you I'd revisit its definition.
Dear Twitter follower, unfollower, blocker, protected tweeter, public tweeter, follower, unfollower, blocker, unblocker, blocker, protected tweeter (in that order, all in the span of about 60 days), the fact that you continue to read my blog and search the twitter stream for my tweets, all-the-while posting passive-aggressive tweets in response to what you find, and not only denying you are doing so - but claiming you are the victim - is just plain CREEPY! Your social media psychosis says far more about you than it does about me.I know from experience, passive-aggressive really isn't the best way to handle things - seldom will it do anything other than give you a feeling of false superiority and an "out" should you get called on it. Heaven knows I've tried the direct approach with you several times, most recently with no response other than additional passive-aggressive tweets/blog post innuendos.
If passive-aggressive is your only mode of dealing with conflict, you might want to insure that you can take it as well as you dish it out. Yes, I've been giving you exactly what I've been getting from you, but at least I have the scruples and personal integrity to admit to it.
That word hypocrite that you throw around so casually? If I were you I'd revisit its definition.
*Inhales*
*Exhales*
*Exhales*
~*~
Cam's been at band camp since Tuesday and will be home tonight. Let me tell you, getting him there was no easy feat.
Band camp permission forms were due back in May, but because of the uncertainty surrounding where Cam would start his HS classes in the fall, I was apprehensive about forking over the $100 for a camp he might not be able to attend. In early May, I sent an email to the HS band director asking for her guidance. She didn't respond.
Cam seemed less than enthusiastic about going to band camp, so I dropped the issue figuring it wasn't worth the aggravation (imagine that)! Then in June, Cam brings it up again - he wants to go if there is any possible way. I re-send the email. Again, no response.
I follow up with two voice mails to the HS band director (who is in the HS building all summer giving private lessons) and I still get no response.
At my wits end, last Friday I called the special education coordinator for the district hoping she might be able to act as a mediator (she had been copied on all of the previous emails).
I get a call Monday morning at 11:00 letting me know that Cam can go to band camp if he has all of his forms filled out and I pay the $100 fee by 3:00 that same afternoon. I was a mom on a mission. Success was mine!
Now let's hope he got something out of it other than a story that starts with, "This one time, at band camp ..."
Band camp permission forms were due back in May, but because of the uncertainty surrounding where Cam would start his HS classes in the fall, I was apprehensive about forking over the $100 for a camp he might not be able to attend. In early May, I sent an email to the HS band director asking for her guidance. She didn't respond.
Cam seemed less than enthusiastic about going to band camp, so I dropped the issue figuring it wasn't worth the aggravation (imagine that)! Then in June, Cam brings it up again - he wants to go if there is any possible way. I re-send the email. Again, no response.
I follow up with two voice mails to the HS band director (who is in the HS building all summer giving private lessons) and I still get no response.
At my wits end, last Friday I called the special education coordinator for the district hoping she might be able to act as a mediator (she had been copied on all of the previous emails).
I get a call Monday morning at 11:00 letting me know that Cam can go to band camp if he has all of his forms filled out and I pay the $100 fee by 3:00 that same afternoon. I was a mom on a mission. Success was mine!
Now let's hope he got something out of it other than a story that starts with, "This one time, at band camp ..."
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I want to clarify my position on this whole Asperger's Syndrome thing as I've gotten mixed input from readers. I am not self-diagnosing, but I am acknowledging that I have many of the same thought processes and challenges that Penelope Trunk describes on her blog.
Prior to reading Penelope's blog, I just assumed that everyone thought the way I did, but were much better (i.e. smarter, more intuitive, more relational, etc.) at handling it than I was. It just never occurred to me that I might be anything other than crazy and/or a shitty person who isn't capable of being successful in friendships/relationships.
I doubt I'll ever go to the trouble of seeking a diagnosis to find the appropriate label to call "it." I'm not a big fan of labels anyway. I am who I am and I've been this way for, let's see ... 2010 - 1964 = ... 46 years! Calling "it" anything other than "me" offers no benefit to anyone, however I am hoping to benefit from Penelope's insight and suggestions, personally, professionally and in the ways that I relate to Cam.
Prior to reading Penelope's blog, I just assumed that everyone thought the way I did, but were much better (i.e. smarter, more intuitive, more relational, etc.) at handling it than I was. It just never occurred to me that I might be anything other than crazy and/or a shitty person who isn't capable of being successful in friendships/relationships.
I doubt I'll ever go to the trouble of seeking a diagnosis to find the appropriate label to call "it." I'm not a big fan of labels anyway. I am who I am and I've been this way for, let's see ... 2010 - 1964 = ... 46 years! Calling "it" anything other than "me" offers no benefit to anyone, however I am hoping to benefit from Penelope's insight and suggestions, personally, professionally and in the ways that I relate to Cam.
~*~
Weekend plans include spending time at our local village summer-fest (free roasted, locally harvested corn for everyone!), watching Cam march in his first parade on Sunday (in the percussion section, none-the-less) and catching up with those things one must do on the weekends - laundry, cleaning, all the fun stuff.
Have a great weekend Ruffians!
Have a great weekend Ruffians!
~*~*~
16 comments:
I loathe passive-aggressive behavior. I lived with it for 14 years. It got to the point where her p/a was rubbing off on me. I left, corrected myself, and now just tell people to fuck off...or not. Have a lovely, corn fueled weekend Dana. Cheers!!
I would also like to note that I wasn't trying to diagnose or make assumptions by sending the link! I like her blog because she usually frames things from a workplace perspective and who among us couldn't benefit from that kind of communication and coping advice? And as a totally socially awkward person myself, it helps to have the "rules" spelled out.
Lots to say here;
First I love a girl fight so I think Im gonna check out your twitter page and see what I can find out.
The HS Band Teacher- UUUGGHH!!! Completely inappropriate for them to not answer your emails or calls. That is definitely an issue and school hasn't even started! You may wanna nip that in the bud real quick. I know you already know what to do as this is not your first time around the track with idiotic teachers. And I'm sorry but ignoring emails and calls is idiotic.
Cams Performance- Yeah! You should post some pics of that I bet that will be cute!
Enjoy your weekend and the corn.
I also wanted to tell you that my sister has a child that is 17 and has a list of emotional behavioral issues. When I read your blog I often think of her and what she goes through. Yesterday I talked to her about your blog and sent her a link to it so that she could read it. I think you both share a lot of the same issues and ideas so it will be interesting to see what she thinks. I'll let you know if she doesn't.
You know what I think? I think you should send me a DM and fill me in on this drama that would be a great distraction for me right now! Hook it up, please!
Yay on band camp. Boo on the administration who doesn't return calls and/or emails. That kind of crap drives me batty and no one wants a batty ME on the other end of the phone line. Or, in their face. LOL.
I dunno Dana, I followed you publicly on another blog for a long time and we've even had lunch in a podunk town in Texas once. I liked you immediately and we had a great time...shitty and or crazy I would never use to describe you. Been meaning to say that for a while now.
Have a good weekend, mama.
Beryl
I think it's about time for Cam to have a "This one time at Band Camp" story. What? Okay, maybe next year. haha ;-)
Matt-Man, the behavior does suck - especially when coming from a person who is "better" than that.
Maggie, see? That's exactly why I thought you sent it! Didn't think - in any way - you were "diagnosing" anything other than the fact that she offers some great relational advise for folks who might struggle in that area!
Raquel's World, Who said it was a girl?? ;)
The issue with the email was less frustrating than than the voice mail. Ironic that parent email often go to the SPAM folder. Seems the district conveniently tightened the filtering recently, so more times than not, a teacher must send you an email first to actually receive anything from you. But the voice mail? I was even nice!!
I hope your sister does stop by and offer some insight. Sharing ideas is always a good thing!
Gina, although I'd love to keep you distracted right now, this is a personal issue between two people (at least I think it is). My intent in this passive-aggressive approach was to vent, not to have people choosing sides!
Evil Twin's Wife, I did get an email apology from the band director, but I'd sure be interested to learn what happened so that I can avoid it in the future.
Beryl, I can only think of one person this could be - had no idea you were still around and wouldn't have had you not given me a hint! Good to see you back!
Jay, unfortunately, I wouldn't be surprised if he *did* have one of those stories. I'll probably read about it on Facebook!
Whew! Glad I don't tweet.
just for the record, it ain't snugs or doggy :)
Osbasso, I just don't get all of the angst and drama that some need to thrive on. YOU would never do that :)
snugs, NO.IT'S.NOT!
I have a hard enough time keeping up with a blog let alone tweets. And then tweet twits would be way to much.
I am not fond of the PA people. They annoy the crap out of me.
Did you just give the offender a golden shower? lol That would be so suitable!
I'm so glad that Cam got to go to band camp. And frankly, I love a good story! Hope he comes home with some mild ones!!!
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