I will no longer have sex with you when you've been drinking, even if it is the only time you ever seem to want it. Not only does your performance suffer greatly, but I feel worse about myself when it is over.
This secret REALLY makes me sad.... Especially since I'm sitting here with JackDaniel's & Cola in my hand. Thank God! I'm not particularly horny at the moment or it would really be hitting close to home.
I know better then to read your Sunday Secret but I can't resist.
Sure fire way to assist in lowering ones self esteme, have sex with a loved onefor the wrong reason and compound that if it's performed badly. Wham bam hiccup and maybe you'll get a thank you Mam. Good idea but watch that refusing a drunken pass doesn't get you physically hurt and not just emotionally hurt.
The song "Let's Get Drunk and Screw" is a cute song, but necessarily the way to go in real life. I applaud you holding to a standard. I hope he raises his.
Lu, funny thing - last night was the first time this situation presented itself, and the first time I said, "No." It didn't go over well, but it did go better than I expected.
Kannon7, raises his standard? Hmmmm ... what a concept.
FF, I was told last night to never complain about not getting sex if I wasn';t willing to have drunk sex *shrugs*
I had a similar relationship with my first husband, only there was no booze involved. We would go six months without sex, and then he would feel bad. It would be this fast, rough episode that left me feeling as though I'd been sexually assualted. Taught me not to complain, that's for sure.
I wouldn`t know, but this comes to mind....http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/shaniatwain/manifeellikeawoman.html i`m guessing your going to be "every ready" these days ;)
36 comments:
This secret makes me so sad.
I'm so sorry, sweetie. You deserve more than that.
This secret REALLY makes me sad....
Especially since I'm sitting here with JackDaniel's & Cola in my hand. Thank God! I'm not particularly horny at the moment or it would really be hitting close to home.
I know better then to read your Sunday Secret but I can't resist.
Sure fire way to assist in lowering ones self esteme, have sex with a loved onefor the wrong reason and compound that if it's performed badly. Wham bam hiccup and maybe you'll get a thank you Mam. Good idea but watch that refusing a drunken pass doesn't get you physically hurt and not just emotionally hurt.
The song "Let's Get Drunk and Screw" is a cute song, but necessarily the way to go in real life. I applaud you holding to a standard. I hope he raises his.
I agree, that is sad. :(
Several women who have been with me share your secret. Here's to ya Dana. Cheers!!
Boo, yeah ... it's not a silly one this week!
Jenni, yes ... yes I do!
Al, put the Jack Down!
Lu, funny thing - last night was the first time this situation presented itself, and the first time I said, "No." It didn't go over well, but it did go better than I expected.
Kannon7, raises his standard? Hmmmm ... what a concept.
FF, I was told last night to never complain about not getting sex if I wasn';t willing to have drunk sex *shrugs*
I had a similar relationship with my first husband, only there was no booze involved. We would go six months without sex, and then he would feel bad. It would be this fast, rough episode that left me feeling as though I'd been sexually assualted. Taught me not to complain, that's for sure.
Ok, I'm sorry, it won't happen again.
The Trailer Of Love
Sex and booze doesn`t really go well together at all.
Makes sense to me!
Matt-Man, the goal is to fix the secret, not contribute to it! *wink*
Biscuit, that is EXACTLY how I feel - sexually assaulted.
Wil, it better not!
Well, one of my many patented glib answers... "Buf, I like you better when you don't drink".. "Well I like you better when I do"..
Mike, they might be comfortable companions in your 20's, but at 46 the alcohol creates more problems than it solves.
Nick, I'm just glad I was able to stay true to my word.
Buff, OUCH! All that I can say is that is exactly how I feel and why I've made the decision to not allow it any longer.
I guess we all get what we pay for....
Good for you for standing up for what makes you feel honored.
You really do deserve to be treated with dignity, love and respect.
Sorry Dana, that is sad. ((hugs))
yes i know, that why i hardy touch it myself!
damn
thats bad.
DB, I'm not even sure how to take that comment, so I will just leave it alone.
RLL, it actually felt quite good to say "No" and mean it.
Rage, but there is a bright side - I can (and did) say "No"!
You're in control, and that's all you need to know. I admire you for that. xoxo
((Hugs, Dana))
Sad is right. Your strength is that you can *see* it and share it here. I admire you & look up to you for that.
Keep being *you* & keep making your requests and desires known.
(((More hugs, hun)))
The hardest part is that it feels insulting. I would rather buy batteries.
Drunken sex is only fun if you are both tanked.
good for you! Drunk connections normally suck.
Intimacy is meant to bring people closer, to add value to the human experience. When it fails to do so, it's worthless.
Glad you made the choice you did my friend.
I had a "similiar" secret with my first boyfriend..but he was a druggie...
:(
feeling your pain...
I understand completely. I've told Chris the same thing. I will NOT have sex while you're drunk, so quit trying.
Mike, some times it's good to be a woman *wink*
SS, it is ...
Rage, I don't know that I'm in control, but I am beginning to set boundaries, and that has to be good!
I Smile, "here" is a relatively safe place - sharing it in real life takes all of the courage I can muster.
Knight, my guess is that I should likely buy stock in Duracell!
Karen, especially when they are one-sided.
Anndi, I think worthless might be an understatement.
*sweet*, it's not a fun place to be - wanting that intimacy - knowing the only time you'll get it is when the other person is "compromised"
Bina, this is a new boundary for me, and it didn't go over too well for him, but it made me feel good!
I wouldn`t know, but this comes to mind....http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/shaniatwain/manifeellikeawoman.html
i`m guessing your going to be "every ready" these days ;)
This is a sad secret. Having a close, intimate relationship is something we all need badly.
I went many years without one, but have found it again with a wonderful woman..
Hopefully, you will also.
Hear, hear!
atta girl.
not easy to say no sometimes....it takes a strong woman.
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