It seems some (most?) people believe "it's simply impolite to make judgmental comments about someone within their presence – especially without being invited to do so." And they never fail to use the "B" word ... BULLY!
There are also bloggers out there who have written open letters to their internet trolls stating (in part):
I get it.
Trolls suck.
I've certainly had my challenges with trolls (DoggyBloggy, snugs, the petty, vindictive asshole acquaintance who attempted to get me fired by sending my URL to my employer, etc.). I do believe bloggers are entitled to choose to delete attacking comments and to block offenders' URLs, without question. A blog is the personal space of the blogger - their internet house if you will. The author of the blog has some control over that space.
But to claim no one should ever say anything "bad" (bad as defined by the blogger, not by the people who are writing outside of that blogger's space) or disparaging about any blogger anywhere? To call that bullying?
Ridiculous I say ... absolutely ridiculous!
I don't shy away from controversy and confrontation, although I prefer to do it in public. In some people's opinions, I don't deal with it in the most mature way (i.e. calling people out in this space).
I'm good with that.
I've written posts on this blog that have pissed people off (this one will likely be no exception) and I intend to continue doing that. My opinion is mine to share. You decide if it is of any value to you.
I don't believe in the "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all ... at least not to my face or where I, or my adoring readers, might find it" mentality.
I think Lancelle from Paris says it best in Mommy Bloggers Wish You Would Keep Your Comments To Yourselves (and I don't think this AGREE WITH ME OR YOU ARE A MEAN BULLY phenomena is specific to Mommy Bloggers - it seems to be wide spread):
What do you think?
Should sites such as Get Of My Internets be shut down because they are encouraging "bullying"?
10 comments:
Freedom of speech does not mean freedom from consequence for the things you say. And it's one thing to post critiques of a blog - quite another to spread gossip about someone. Gossip can impact a person's livelihood and reputation. To spread information publicly that is either untrue or told in confidence is completely shitty.
Crystal T, I agree! It is shitty! But the question is, should people be banned from doing so on the internet? Should we go back to the good old days when people just talked behind your back and smiled at your face?
Personally? I'd rather know what people think about me rather than being fooled by the smile on their face.
I'm sure not everyone feels that way.
Here's my question (and it's not to you, just in general). Bloggers who are higher profile do get more heat than those who are not. But where is the line drawn? What I post on my blog, for example, are the words I use to describe a snapshot (for lack of a better term) of my life. There is a private me who has a private life and likes it that way. I do not share every moment with the world, nor do I plan to. If you want to judge me by things I've written, that's fine - I know I'm a crapballs writer. But what about my private life? Are bloggers allowed to have those, too?
Becky, that is an excellent question, and one that I don't have an excellent answer for.
Just as is true for any "celebrity", it seems people are more interested (for lack of a better word) in the stuff behind the snapshot that bloggers provide publicly. It's a common blogging conundrum - and the type of blog one writes seems to dictate just how much people want to pry (lifestyle/mommy blogs seem to get the brunt of it).
It's the side effect of blogging noteriety. It's the ugly part of "fame" that people seldom think about before it hits them.
In a perfect world, everyone (celebrity, high-profile blogger, Joe Smith down the street, etc.) would be able to put out in public what they want to put out in public and keep private what they want to keep private, but we all know about that perfect world.
I know, that wasn't an answer, but I don't have an answer.
I followed this gal for awhile. Then she joined a contest which she won and it sent her from 50 followers to 2000. Her blog changed completly. There's no way you can interact with 2000 people.
I'm thinking this "Get Off My Internets" site is a good place to go and anonymously start some gossip about myself to give me some needed publicity!
Gossip is bullshit, but there's nothing you can do about it. But, there are a lot of people who clearly believe they have some special right to never be questioned or criticized for any reason.
Having said that though, we should all be able to express our opinions without some random person we've never met launching a hate-filled personal attack against us.
Mike, I think that when a blog goes from few readers, to a "high profile" blog, the writing is bound to change, if fo no other reason than because without that personal filter, the blogger is subjected to what is probably an unfair amount of scrutiny.
I'm With Stupid (Jay), I'm thinking this "Get Off My Internets" site is a good place to go and anonymously start some gossip about myself to give me some needed publicity!
Ha! Funny you said that! As I was looking at the site I wondered if anyone had gone in under an anonymous user name and done just that.
For the most part, that site is strictly a gossip club. Most of what is said there lacks any facts to back it up. It's primarily, "Well, my friend who knows so-and-so told me {INSERT SOME BIT OF SHOCKING REVELATION}" stuff. I haven't read anything hate-filled there, just judgment and heresay.
And you are right, gossip will always be around, and I'd venture to say that we've all been part of that at some level, and at one time or another.
It's a fine line.
That's all I'll say. ;)
Gina, I believe you are right. The other part of this? Each blogger is likely going to draw the line in a different place. What is okay for one might be way over the top for another.
Someone called you out to your employer? I don't think that crossed a line as much as leaped over the Grand Canyon. WTF is that about?
Cecily's blog saying no one gets a say when she publishes on the internet is ridiculous. She puts out lots of personal stuff about her life. People are going to comment on it - the good, bad and ugly. Unfortunately, human nature thinks the ugly is the most fun to talk about. Don't like it, don't write it online.
GOMI should not be shut down. If you want a record of your life, you can do it off the internet. I'm sure there are plenty of journal programs out there. A simple WordPad doc could be used too. You could even write using a pen and paper! You could also blog anonymously and be careful not to let your identity out.
Also, some people think they are anonymous but since they outed themselves to someone they didn't know well from the internet, their identity becomes known. Don't do that!
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