30 January 2013

High School Memories - PART IV



***

On Friday, at 3:58 PM, I received the following text from Cam's best friend's mom, Susan:
Could you give me a call when you have a minute? No bad news ;)
A little background first.

Cam and Andy have been friends for 5 or 6 years. I used to take them to the middle school church youth group every Wednesday. Even when Cam did the therapeutic day school stint his freshman/sophomore year,  he and Andy remained friends.

Andy comes from a very well-off family, but his parents are advocates of hard work and no free ride. They are fairly strict and demand a lot from their sons (Andy has an older brother). I've always been thrilled with this friendship. The boys really are good together.

So yes, there is a lot of good history between the boys, and Susan and I communicate frequently, insuring the boys are doing what they need to be doing. Getting a text from her was not at all unusual.

I called her back and we had kind of an odd conversation. She's been following what little I post about Cam's school struggles on Facebook and had been filled in on some of the other details from both boys. She told me that she and her husband wondered if I'd come over for a few beers on Saturday. They'd like to talk to me and offer some support with the situation.

Mike has been extremely supportive of me when it comes to Cam's education. He attends all of Cam's IEP meetings. He is a sounding board and offers a different perspective. But the idea of having more support - especially from someone who also has a teenage son - was certainly welcome.

When I got to their house Saturday, they told me what had prompted this meeting. In yet another pending situation (seriously - all teenagers should be sent FAR away), Cam has been accused of what we'll call harassment.  The person who filed the complaint lives a good 30 miles from us (a classmate from Cam's therapeutic day school). Her allegations included that Cam came to her bus stop and made threats on a Friday afternoon.

I have Cam's phone GPS-ed. It logs Cam's location every 15 minutes, or more often if he changes location. I was able to prove that Cam was not within 15 miles of where the alleged harassment took place, yet because Cam was with Andy that afternoon, the investigators also wanted Andy's contact information to confirm the data I'd already given them.

Guess who was selected to interview Andy?

My friend the School Resource Officer.

When he finished interviewing Andy, he tells Andy that he really needs to find better friends. That Cam is bad news and that Andy can do much better.

*blink*

*blink*

Then the SRO calls Andy's parents to inform them of Andy's interview. When Andy's dad asked why he was interviewed, the SRO mentioned that there was an incident with Cam in a neighboring town and Andy was his alibi. Oh! And by the way ... they really should keep Andy away from Cam because Cam isn't a good friend for Andy to have.

*blink*

*blink*

Although I'm certain the SRO's intent was to warn Andy's innocent parents about the evils of Cam, what it did instead was confirm to Andy's parents that what I had been saying on Facebook was true.

They know Cam.

They know what kind of kid he is.

They've seen his struggles and his successes.

I'm not one of those "NOT MY KID!" parents. I'll be the first to admit that Cam has not been a perfect angel. That he's forged some questionable friendships in the past that have altered the way some people (those in authority) see him. That he's made some mistakes along the way - more mistakes than many kids make. He's not had an easy time of things, and some of that is his own doing.

I also know that I've been told by many of Cam's friends, and a handful of parents and teachers, that they believe Cam is being singled out - watched more closely - punished more severely.

Why? *shrugs*

Although it makes me uncomfortable to say it, the only thing that makes sense is that it is, at least in part, a racial issue. Cam is the big (6'-4", 225 lb), bad, black kid - 1 of maybe 10 in a high school of 800 kids. He had to be sent away to a therapeutic day school for 1-1/2 years. He questions authority. His grades are "bad".

Unfortunately, the public school system seems to be immune from the checks and balances of the rest of society. I was told by the Dean of Students that he was the "judge and jury" of the high school and it didn't matter if I thought he was being fair or not.

The only way to fight this ignorance is with an attorney, and that has been a luxury not available to me.

That was about to change ...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

In the future, under no circumstance should a minor be interview by a SRO without a parent present. There is an agenda at play here and the sooner you uncover it the better. Your boy may intimidate teachers just because of his size alone and they want him gone. It's important to aggressively defend your son.

Mike said...

This is un-fucking-believable.

Tracy Dee said...

I agree with Anonymous, there definitely sounds like they have an agenda. And I wouldn't be at all surprised to hear it might be a racial issue. I'm glad that Andy's parents are not giving in to the pressure to force Andy to abandon Cam. Ugh. School, you are *not* helping.

Tracy Dee said...

**it** definitely sounds... sorry!