If you've been following me for a while you know that weight is ... well ... a weighty issue for me. My relationship with food is so far off the "normal meter" it isn't funny. I know that, and I don't like it, but as of yet I haven't figured out how to change it.
I have eluded to the fact that I recently regained my significant weight loss from two years ago and am now back into that 16/18 I was so sure I'd never see again.
Like most people, I'd like to be accepted (i.e. acceptable to society, acceptable to myself) no matter how big or small I am. I guess it's no surprise that I found hope in a recent CNN.com article titled
Will 2010 be the 'year of plus'? There was a lot of attention when Glamour published
pictures of naked "plus sized" models. So much so that it appears V Magazine, a "forward thinking" (GAHHH! I hate that phrase) high-fashion magazine recently did it's own tribute to curvy women - the "SIZE" issue.
These are some amazingly gorgeous women!
These "plus-sized" models are all a size 12. In a country where the average size for a woman is a 14, I have to wonder just how "plus" they are, but setting that aside, they are most definitely not the traditional women we see in high-fashion editorial spreads, and that is good, right?
As much as I am frustrated with a society that I believe is preoccupied with - and judgmental of -
fat overweight women, why is it that I look at the above photo and think, "She looks beautiful on the left with her fat rolls covered up, but that picture on the right? Acckk!"
When I look at the photo on the left, the first thing I see is a beautiful face, a woman who exudes sensuality and self-confidence.
I'm embarrassed to admit that when I look at the photo on the right, the first thing I see are fat rolls.
Here I am complaining that, at my current weight, I'm not acceptable to
myself society and yet I am perpetuating the problem.
I debated closing comments for this post. There will be those who believe I've written this post in an attempt to generate compliments. I'm not sure I want to hear their negativity - it just adds to my own - and it couldn't be further from the truth.
What I want to hear is how those of you who DON'T think this way came to that place of self-acceptance. How do I change those strongly held convictions that no matter how "good" I might be on the inside, it's the outside that really matters?
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