The i's Have It!

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I had an epiphany when watching Roy Wood Jr. on Last Comic Standing Monday night. In his set, he mentioned how "white folks" should be required to wear a wristband - or have a hand stamp - if they are "black folk" friendly. As he said, "We want to like you, but we just can't tell you from the bad guys!"

I'm thinking this is EXACTLY what I need for my Twitter relationships - color coded twibbons that identify just what type of follower someone is. A visual cue, if you will, alerting me to the social norms and expectations that are reasonable for that follower.

No more guessing, "Is this twitter follower just trying to get free publicity and will unfollow if I don't RT them? Or is this a Twitter relationship with the potential to grow into a 'real life' friendship?" No more hurt feelings when what you think is an iBFF turns into an iQuaintance, or worse yet, runs like an iFrenemy in the middle of the night (similar to the Baltimore Colts).

I propose we use the following color code designators/definitions for all Twitter relationships:

iBFF

This relationship has evolved over a long period of time, through multiple social media venues and often in person. Through mutual respect, trust, and openness, you feel absolutely comfortable sharing private information with the iBFF including your real phone number and street address. When something happens in your life - good or bad - your iBFF is one of the first people you text or DM. You work hard to maintain this bond through reciprocity, accessibility, empathy and compassion. You would never unfollow an iBFF without talking to them face-to-face, or at the very least, on the telephone.

iFriend

This relationship is still in the beginning stages. You are starting to trust them and enjoy the friendship that seems to be blossoming from your tweets and DMs. Loyalty isn’t guaranteed, nor expected, in an iFriend relationship. You might give this person a PO Box to send something to, and you'd arrange for a meeting in a public place, but you'd never consider giving them your real phone number. An iFriend can become an iBFF or an iFrenemy in the span of 140 characters or less so be careful! iFriends will often unfollow without discussion, but everyone will notice.

iQuaintance

This is a random person that follows you and may be active in some of the same cyber communities as you are. You don’t really interact with this follower frequently, but when you do, the banter is casual and friendly. You know very little about each others personal lives, and that's fine - you don’t really care to! iQuaintances can become iFriends over time, but that is a rarity as these followers include celebrities and news agencies. Expectations are low and unfollowing can occur at any time, painlessly and without notice.

iFrenemy

This is a person with whom you may have a lot of common followers/cyber contacts but who also has a random dark side. Expect an iFrenemy to continue haunting old stomping grounds and to never completely go away. The iFrenemy can often be found searching the Twitter stream and talking to iBFF's behind your back. Know too, that you will likely become the iFrenemy's iFrenemy. It is just the natural progression of this relationship. It is recommended, for your own safety and sanity, that you limit yourself to only one iFrenemy at any given time.

Simple, right?? The way I see it Twitter can do away with those silly lists and instead offer color coded twibbons, allowing us to appropriately mark the status of followers based on their iStatus, eliminating Twitter drama and keeping Twitter expectations exactly where they should be *cough*verylow*cough*.

We would have to come up with a special twibbon color for @Jayman3768 's (a.k.a. Cynical Bastard) stripper followers since there really should be an iStripper designator ... I'm thinking pink might do nicely.

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