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Recently, Harris Interactive conducted a Sex Talk Survey on behalf of Seventeen and O (not that O, The Oprah Magazine). This was an online survey and included 1,122 girls ages 15 to 22 and 1,098 mothers who have daughters ages 15-22. Not a large sample group, and not a good sample group for accurate statistical data (i.e. no estimates of theoretical sampling error can be calculated because there was no scientific methodology used) but the results were interesting.
For example ...
Maybe these results don't surprise you - this is an "older" age group. I'm not surprised 22 year olds are having sex, but I am a little disturbed at the extremely high number of girls having unprotected sex. Interestingly enough, do you know which group of people are seeing the greatest increase in the number of AIDS cases? Yes ... heterosexual women.
The other side of this study addressed girls who had "The Talk" with their mothers - three in five of respondents saying it “influenced” their sexual choices positively.
For example, of the teens who had talked to their mothers prior to having sex ...
Are we, as parents, not talking to our girls (and boys) about sex? These results, although not scientific in nature, would indicate that we aren't, but that maybe we should be.
Remember that Birds, Bees and Purity post I did? Cam and I have had several open discussions about sex since then. Not only have we talked about the reasons it is best to wait to have sex, but we've talked about what to do if he doesn't wait. We've talked about masturbation (a topic I think we tend to see as taboo in this society - especially for our girls). We've talked about the importance of condoms - ALWAYS!
Are these difficult discussions to have with our kids? Absolutely, but the days of herpes being our greatest concern are long gone. I believe kids need to have accurate and honest information to make the best decision they are capable of making. No one wants their 15 year old daughter to come home and announce she is pregnant, nor have their 15 year old son come home and announce that he is going to be a father. And those are not, by any means, the most dreadful outcomes.
Talk to your kids about sex - before they make uninformed decisions on their own. Trust me, if you don't talk to them, their peers will, and that, if nothing else, should scare you into action.
For example ...
- Fifty-six percent of the girls who are no longer virgins said they’ve had sex without any form of birth control and two-thirds of them (66 percent) kept it a secret from their mothers.
- Nearly one-third (30 percent) of the 15-18 year olds in the survey said they had oral sex; about double the number mothers of girls in that age group know about—or even suspected (14 percent).
- Three-quarters of teen girls who have lost their virginity say they’ve engaged in sex without a condom.
- One-third of sexually active students reported engaging in vaginal or anal sex without a condom within the past three months, and one-fourth had four or more partners.
Maybe these results don't surprise you - this is an "older" age group. I'm not surprised 22 year olds are having sex, but I am a little disturbed at the extremely high number of girls having unprotected sex. Interestingly enough, do you know which group of people are seeing the greatest increase in the number of AIDS cases? Yes ... heterosexual women.
The other side of this study addressed girls who had "The Talk" with their mothers - three in five of respondents saying it “influenced” their sexual choices positively.
For example, of the teens who had talked to their mothers prior to having sex ...
- Sixty percent said it influenced them.
- About one-quarter (26 percent) of girls said having “The Talk” with their mothers has made them practice (or plan to practice) safe sex. The same number said it made them wait (or plan to wait) longer to have it.
- Eighteen percent of girls said talking to their mothers made them use (or plan to use) hormonal birth control.
Are we, as parents, not talking to our girls (and boys) about sex? These results, although not scientific in nature, would indicate that we aren't, but that maybe we should be.
Remember that Birds, Bees and Purity post I did? Cam and I have had several open discussions about sex since then. Not only have we talked about the reasons it is best to wait to have sex, but we've talked about what to do if he doesn't wait. We've talked about masturbation (a topic I think we tend to see as taboo in this society - especially for our girls). We've talked about the importance of condoms - ALWAYS!
Are these difficult discussions to have with our kids? Absolutely, but the days of herpes being our greatest concern are long gone. I believe kids need to have accurate and honest information to make the best decision they are capable of making. No one wants their 15 year old daughter to come home and announce she is pregnant, nor have their 15 year old son come home and announce that he is going to be a father. And those are not, by any means, the most dreadful outcomes.
Talk to your kids about sex - before they make uninformed decisions on their own. Trust me, if you don't talk to them, their peers will, and that, if nothing else, should scare you into action.
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